| The wife is easily influenced by the | | | | Many people are under the false impression |
| mainstream media. Ever since the BBC first | | | | that it was the English who invented the |
| aired 'Heroes', she believes she has | | | | beautiful game. It's a little known fact |
| supernatural abilities. I've tried to | | | | that it was actually an Irishman whose potato |
| explain that 'sensing' I'm not in a romantic | | | | was too hot. I think we all know that |
| mood does not equate to a 'power'; she's | | | | Denmark are too strong for Northern Ireland |
| merely deduced that I haven't been drinking | | | | at 5/4. |
| heavily. | | | | |
| | | | For a modern day footballer, a healthy diet |
| I, however, have a genuine gift. I can make | | | | is absolutely essential - so I'm guessing |
| kitchen appliances spring to life just by | | | | that Sir Alex Ferguson is far from happy with |
| talking to them. Just last night, I switched | | | | Ronaldo. The orange winger is quoted as |
| the oven on by staring it and growling, | | | | saying, "I dated a girl from Manchester, and |
| "Cook…Cook now…Cook now or else." | | | | she showed me that steak pies and chips are |
| It was a pressure cooker. | | | | very good." I was left flabbergasted by this |
| | | | revelation: Ronaldo dated a girl. Portugal |
| Tal Ben-Haim definitely has a unique ability, | | | | are the weekend banker at 1/12 against |
| he can run in slow motion in real time. The | | | | Armenia. |
| plodding defender will become a bona fide | | | | |
| English hero if Israel snatch a result | | | | The more I think about it, the most useful |
| against Russia. | | | | super-power to possess would definitely be |
| | | | X-ray vision. Imagine the possibilities: you |
| The Russians have been priced up at 8/15 for | | | | could wander around the streets at night, |
| the match, and that's shorter than Paul | | | | checking for fractured metatarsals. I can |
| McCartney's arms. Only Croatia have won a | | | | see right through the 1/2 for a Czech |
| competitive international in Israel over the | | | | Republic win over Slovakia. |
| last eight years; while France, England and | | | | |
| Spain have all fell considerably short. The | | | | When angry, I am blessed with super-human |
| Israelis are a must-bet at 9/5 to avoid | | | | strength. All it would take for me to lift |
| defeat. | | | | the wife clear up into the air is mild |
| | | | provocation and a forklift truck. Spain will |
| If I had the choice of a new power to | | | | run over Sweden at a hefty 4/5. |
| acquire, it would definitely be the ability | | | | |
| to afford copious amounts of alcohol without | | | | As much as I enjoy being able to pick up |
| the need for employment. Only the rich and | | | | overweight women, I'd much rather be |
| the Scottish can currently pull this off. | | | | invisible; like the 1939 - 1945 chapter in a |
| | | | German history book. We won't be seeing 1/6 |
| The Jocks are one win away from arguably the | | | | for a Germany win over Cyprus for very long. |
| greatest shock in international football | | | | |
| since Ryan Giggs played two consecutive games | | | | One often underrated power is the ability to |
| for Wales. I can't see the Italians | | | | absorb the strengths of those around you. I |
| surrendering, but 10/3 about the Sweaties is | | | | could meet up with Arsene Wenger and ooze |
| verging on tempting. | | | | intelligence, chat with Jeff Stelling and |
| | | | become cool, or sit down with Oliver Holt and |
| Peter Reid, Terry Venables and Ron Atkinson | | | | write inane drivel. I'm definitely feeling |
| have all been linked with the vacant | | | | the 5/4 for Norway against the soon to be |
| managerial hotseat with the Republic of | | | | eliminated Turks. |
| Ireland. Even after 400 years; we never tire | | | | |
| of stitching up the Irish. | | | | Time travel remains the ultimate goal for all |
| | | | sci-fi obsessed nerds. There's no doubt that |
| Ireland may be rudderless, but they face a | | | | the world could potentially be changed for |
| Welsh team with even less direction. Wales | | | | the better: we could eliminate the cause of |
| have definitely gone backwards under John | | | | wars, famine, decease and Frank Lampard. |
| 'one good decision' Toshack; his penultimate | | | | Nothing can stop Denmark, Portugal, Czech |
| game in charge may well end in a draw at 9/4. | | | | Republic, Spain, Germany and Norway from |
| | | | landing an 11/1 accer. |