| To claim that the Republic of Ireland | | | | Stapleton are names that inspire notions |
| football team is in trouble is a bit of | | | | of bravery, passion and triumph in the |
| an understatement. In truth, Ireland’s | | | | name of the Irish cause. Players such as |
| fate in Group 4 of the World Cup 2006 | | | | these can no longer be called upon to |
| qualifiers was as predictable as that of | | | | pull on the green jersey, and Irish |
| a drunk farmer from Cavan trying to take | | | | football has suffered as a result. Brian |
| on Mr. T, armed only with three potatoes | | | | Kerr, in all his lukewarm glory, was |
| and a whistle. Watching the final three | | | | forced to operate with a squad of |
| games against France, Cyprus and | | | | utility players, cockney wide-boys and |
| Switzerland was enough to put even the | | | | water carriers. To lay the failure of |
| most hardened of Irish supporters into a | | | | this current side at the feet of Kerr is |
| coma. The exuberance and passion that we | | | | indeed short-sighted. He just didn’t |
| saw in Paris last autumn had ceded into | | | | have the quality at his disposal. |
| tedium and ineptitude. This Irish squad, | | | | The prospects for the future are no more |
| seemingly rejuvenated under Brian Kerr, | | | | encouraging. With the retirements of Roy |
| was shown to be nothing more than a | | | | Keane, Kenny Cunningham and Steven Carr, |
| cut-and-paste team, a hollow side bereft | | | | this side is utterly devoid of |
| of inspiration, desire, and most | | | | leadership or experience of any kind. |
| importantly, any traces of true quality. | | | | "What about Robbie Keane?”, you may |
| The fallout from this ‘glorious | | | | say. |
| failure’ has been swift and tiresome | | | | Pah. It is indeed a troubling situation |
| in its inevitability. Brian Kerr’s | | | | when the Irish attack is spearheaded by |
| tenure as manager has well and truly | | | | a top-heavy runt from Tallaght who |
| been flushed down the crapper, leaving | | | | possesses as much football intelligence |
| this team at a crossroads even more | | | | as a newborn calf. Damien Duff, for all |
| daunting than that which was faced | | | | his quality, is not a player who |
| post-Saipan. | | | | responds well to the attacking burden |
| In their search for a replacement for | | | | that Ireland increasingly places on him. |
| Kerr, the FAI [Football Association of | | | | Kevin Kilbane resembles a cross between |
| Ireland] have already begun to shovel | | | | a scared ferret and a pedestrian trying |
| their delusions of grandeur into the | | | | to cross the M7. John O’Shea is a |
| media faster than Darren Campbell on | | | | player that is drowning in his own |
| Prozac. Sir Alex Ferguson, Martin | | | | versatility, increasingly becoming a |
| O’Neill and David O’Leary are | | | | plug for both club and country, filling |
| apparently the forerunners for this | | | | holes wherever he is needed. As for the |
| position, or so FAI Chief Executive John | | | | former great white hope, one Liam |
| Delaney would have us all think. None of | | | | Miller, it is now evident that this man |
| these men are likely to touch the job | | | | is so lightweight his middle name must |
| with a ten foot barge pole. This comical | | | | be helium. In Shay Given, this Ireland |
| exhibition of crap personifies the | | | | side possess the last consistent and |
| problems that the FAI are likely to face | | | | truly world class performer we are |
| in the coming years. Rather than come to | | | | likely to see for some time. Surely he |
| terms with Ireland’s limitations as a | | | | must be the only plausible candidate for |
| team, Delaney and his cronies at Merrion | | | | the now vacant captaincy. |
| Square perceive the Irish national side | | | | At times like these, when a team has |
| to be a true football giant, espousing | | | | collapsed under a burden of expectation, |
| quality from every orifice. Bollocks. | | | | when a manager has been thrown to the |
| The collective pool of Irish talent, for | | | | wolves, and the bandwagons have begun to |
| now at least, has well and truly dried | | | | circle the crash site, it is easy to be |
| up. | | | | overly critical. In the true nature of |
| This Irish side, unlike any other this | | | | the Irish football fan, our support will |
| writer can remember, instils supporters | | | | not waiver. We will continue to echo our |
| with little or no confidence in their | | | | favour as blindly passionate as before. |
| ability to compete at an international | | | | However, it is worryingly clear that in |
| level. In the past, the list of truly | | | | the future, the essence of our belief |
| world class players at the disposal of | | | | will not be derived from our faith in |
| the national team rivalled any of our | | | | the present, but our fondness for the |
| European competitors. Kevin Moran, Paul | | | | past. |
| McGrath, Roy Keane, Liam Brady, John | | | | Barring a minor miracle, the future of |
| Aldridge, Tony ‘I’m not really | | | | Irish international football will not |
| Irish, don’t tell Customs’ | | | | give us much to shout about. |
| Cascarino, Steve Staunton and Frank | | | | |